Forced inactivity

As it turns out, I apparently can't do even a minimal exercise regime right now. Last weekend I did an easy half hour on the elliptical. I tried not to use my arms at all, but kept them on the heart rate bar. I also did some light house cleaning--maybe an hour, cooked soup, and folded laundry. You know, day off stuff.

The next day, my traps and rhomboids were screaming---pain levels up to 5 on a 1-10 scale. Not good.

I know when I'm beat. I have to lay off physical activity for a while, until my back muscles heal (the chiropractor confirmed that this is all muscular, not nerve pain). Who knows how long it will take: a few weeks? A month? Two months? I truly hope it is less than two months. I'm addicted to exercise. And being handicapped in my normal day-to-day tasks, too, drives me crazy.

It is easy to get discouraged, to whine and complain. But I know of three people who are dealing with health issues worse than mine. How can I complain of my own suffering when their suffering is worse than my own?

But I can do my practice. I try to keep my thoughts centered on surrender. On letting the pain and frustration pass through me like clouds, like rain, like breath. I turn the inner eye to watch them pass. I breathe, and ask for the path of surrender. I meditate, and ask only to witness, but not identify with the suffering. I remain mindful of my friends as well, as I practice. As I breathe and ask for non-attachment to the ephemeral, I hope that my friends, too, can find this.

I can only do what I do. I am finding my pranayama and meditation practice to help me not only in the spiritual way I just described, but in other ways as well. The work does help physically relax the muscles and reduce pain. Also, by providing another point of focus for my body, I distract it from the pain. Finally, keeping this practice gives my mind and energy something to focus on that isn't related to my physical problems. It helps fill the gap in my life that my asana practice used to fill.